Bernie: Well, well well. We meet again
Pat: WOW. Holiday eating got to you a bit. Eh Bern?
Bernie: Just once, can you not talk about my weight….and focus on football
Pat: Yes. If you promise just once that you don’t turn on Gossip Girl during Monday Night Football.
Bernie: I can’t believe you went there
Pat: Oh, I went there.
Bernie: Alright, whatever. Time to talk about the Super Bowl!!!
Pat: Not that excited for it, I gotta admit.
Bernie: Well it’s football and I am excited. The Cardinals might actually win their first championship ever.
Pat: Kinda the way you felt when you first started dating Mary Louise last year huh Bern?
Bernie: Pat, she is my wife and has been for 10 years. Would you stop it?
Pat: I like the Cardinals, because I always enjoyed a nice red wine. Red Wine=Red bird.
Bernie: Okay. Well who do you think will win?
Pat: Gotta go with Pittsburgh. Their defense reminds me of what my ex wife used to do when I would want to snuggle.
Bernie: LOL. Yeah< I can see that.
Pat: I don’t see Kurt Warner being able to hold up, which makes me sad.
Bernie: Because you love him?
Pat: I love the idea of him winning, yes.
Bernie: So what about Ben?
Bernie: Roethlisberger. Seriously, are you sure you are not gay.
Pat: Pretty sure, yeah.
Bernie: What do you think about the Eagles losing?
Pat: I think it’s wonderful. That state has won enough championships. Phillies just won the World Series.
Bernie: Um…..Patty—are you sure you really want to say that?
Pat: Um….Bernie—YEAH. Time for another state to win it. Damn PA fans.
Bernie: So…what you’re saying is, you want Arizona to win then.
Pat: Uh, NO. That is NOT what I am saying. I want both teams to do well. I am rooting for both.
Bernie: So then if Pittsburgh wins, then you do realize, PA wins another championship.
Pat: Um. How in the hell do you figure?
Bernie: PITTSBURGH IS THE CAPITAL OF PENNSYLVANIA. PHILADELPHIA IS IN PENNSYLVANIA> THEY HAVE TWO TEAMS.
Pat: You continue to yell at me I will destroy your face.
Bernie: You are ridiculous! How did you not know that.
Pat: Hey my fourth grade teacher was hot. I didn’t always pay attention to what she was saying.
Bernie: Pat, this is something you just don’t learn in fourth grade, I am ashamed.
Pat: Cause of your Mama? Is that why?
Bernie: NO, BECAUSE OF YOU.
Pat: I do remember something though from fourth grade.
Bernie: Please, do tell.
Pat: Harrisburg is the capital of Pennsylvania. I do remember that. Nice try though.
Bernie: (blushing BIG time): Um..welll I was just angry- I knew that.
Pat: haha. You’re so odd looking when you blush.
Bernie: I miss football already.
Pat: I miss Hilda.
Pat: This chick I met off match. She pretty all that. Loves football. Even plays it!
Bernie: Wow, she sure sounds like a keeper.
Pat: So does your mom.
Bernie: PAT! BACK TO FOOTBALL.
Pat: I am going with the Cardinals.
Bernie: You make no sense. Well so am I.
Pat: But Pittsburgh will win.
Bernie: Let’s bet on it.
Pat: I already have won every bet. I am amazing like that. Call me cool hand Pat.
Bernie: Oh dear lord….