Now, a few questions may immediately jump to mind, such as:
1) In any given moment in time, are we more likely to find Chris Bosh in the paint or at Bath and Body Works?
2) Is it true LeBron, D-Wade and Bosh have a clause in their contracts permitting them to do this once every two weeks in the locker room? If not, can we make it so? And if so, was that what LeBron meant by "taking my talents to South Beach"?
3) Who are the Miami Heat's "little three"?
In response to the third question, they are Udonis Haslem, Mike Miller and Joel Anthony.
The three of them make a combined $13,610,000 this season and will each see their salaries bump until the end of 2015, assuming they decide to exercise their player options in 2014 (a very safe assumption, you could say).
Oh yeah, and the only thing more deplorable than this number are their averages.
Miller boasts a cool 3.7 PPG, 2.2 RPG and 1.3 APG in 13.8 minutes of play.
Udonis pitches in 3.9 PPG, 4.9 RPG and 0.2 BPG in 18.9 minutes.
And rounding out the bullpen is Joel Anthony with 1.7 PPG, 1.7 RPG and 0.7 BPG in nine minutes of PT.
Of course, you may argue that these guys were vital members of last year's championship team—Miller with his shooting, Udonis with his hustle and Anthony with his towel-waving—and it would be foolish to get rid of them for a team that is built for the playoffs.
Only, how much does Miami need these guys?
Of the three, Udonis probably seems the most indispensable, if only because of Miami's lack of size and the sentimental value in all he's done as a member of the team.
Anthony has the least market value of the three, but Miami could kill a few birds with one stone by increasing his playing time during a point in the season when teams can afford to gamble on wins in exchange for showcasing trade bait. And perhaps in the process of doing so he will end up being the answer on rebounding that Miami was looking for all along.
Finally, there's Miller, and no one will forget how lethal he was in the series-clinching win over Oklahoma City in last year's NBA Finals. In fact, Miami never looked better in the playoffs than when he and James were both firing on all cylinders.
But now they have Ray Allen to add on top of an ever-increasing squad that includes Shane Battier, James Jones and Miami's go-to peanut butter and jelly sandwich maker, Rashard Lewis.
For all that firepower, I'd say the Heat are in safe hands.
And unless Chris Bosh can develop the mutant ability to web rebounds as if he were Peter Parker, my spidey sense tells me Miami just doesn't have the personnel to address their rebounding.
We know free agency isn't an option or a big man would've been signed by now. Clearly, Kenyon Martin isn't the route the Heat feel comfortable going in.
That being the case, and because we already know that no member of the Big Three is going to get traded, there is really no choice but to see what's available for the little three.
Besides, I'd say it's a much bigger gamble to continue wearing down LeBron James, the Heat's current leading everything, than it would be to ship off Udonis, Miller and/or Anthony for any competent rebounding and size it could possibly get us.
If you didn't notice, the Heat are sort of desperate at this point.