Awkward Sports Instagram Pictures
Are you familiar with Instagram? Or "Insty," as the hip kids call it?
Sure you're familiar—you're a savvy individual who knows full and well that Instagram is the leading social media platform for pictures of food resting on plates, random quotes and puppy images.
You may also be aware of the many professional athletes who post on Instagram. Like the rest of the regular Joes, professional ballplayers also enjoy uploading mundane images of vintage bicycles, sunsets and other things no one else cares about but themselves.
And just like your average social media user, athletes on Instagram will sometimes use the platform to display awkward, concerning and weird pictures the world didn't ask for or need. The following is a selection of some of the most awkward, goofy and misguided pictures involving professional athletes.
The photographs probably seemed like a great idea at the time, but in hindsight, they might being asking themselves, "Why? Why do I do these things?"
Darnell Dockett's Thigh Therapy
Oh, nothing—it's just Darnell Dockett working through his inner thigh therapy.
Docket posted the picture to Instagram along with a caption that stated there's a price for everything and that "some people will never understand."
Darnell, I fear you're underestimating the popularity of sticking needles into the outer limits of your groin. Or you're nailing it right on the head. Either/or.
At Least J.R. Smith Meant Well
He meant well, but J.R. Smith's execution on this Instagram post was a little off base.
Smith posted the picture on September 11, along with the message: "Celebrate the deaths of the people in 9/11! #WELOVEYOU #WEWILLNEVERFORGET."
Obviously, the Knicks guard meant we should celebrate the lives of the victims, but eyebrows still shot up at the unfortunate wording. I know what you mean, J.R. Just remember—phrasing is a cruel mistress.
Kevin Durant and Cliff Dixon Stand Around Shirtless
Kevin Durant captioned this picture: "Skinny and tatted @cldtoon...who cares what u say lol"
In case you were wondering, "@CLDtoon" is Cliff Dixon—a.k.a. the guy pulling a Weekend at Bernie's on the left side of the image. I don't know if he's conscious or not.
Evgeni is man. Evgeni has suit. Evgeni has stick.
You always go hockey-stick casual for work-related photographs—always.
John Wall Is a Hard Man
The place was Runyon Canyon, the man was Washington Wizards point guard John Wall and the time was "Sweat O'Clock."
Nothing like some hard training in the hills followed by a shirtless, dead-faced photo shoot.
Evan Mathis Takes a Stand on Income Tax
According to Sean Newell of Deadspin, hours after Philadelphia Eagles guard Evan Mathis finished urinating on this sign outside the IRS building, the chief of the IRS was forced to resigned.
This is how New York Giants safety Antrel Rolle does "Acupuncture Fridays."
It's also how announces to the world that he's a boxers kind of guy.
Backstreet Boys Pose with Stanley Cup Because Sports
This is a picture of the Backstreet Boys posing with the Stanley Cup, and while random and awkward, it's 100 percent less bilious and awful than Justin Bieber posing with the Stanley Cup.
Nate Burleson Takes the Pizza Party Too Far
A wild bit of front-seat pizza-wrangling led to a totaled car and a broken arm for Detroit Lions wide receiver Nate Burleson earlier this year.
Burleson was driving his car when the pizza in his passenger seat began to slide forward. He lost control of the automobile while attempting to save said pizza and buried his car in the center median.
As is standard procedure for any embarrassing and avoidable accident, Burleson documented the aftermath fastidiously and posted pictures of it to his Instagram account.
It was a weird thing to publicize, but the press he received from the incident earned him a bit of a silver lining. Since the accident, Burleson has received free pizza for a year from DiGiorno—because in this country, professional athletes are rewarded for ruining cars and saving pizza.
Evan Turner Pleads Poverty
I can't confirm if this is Evan Turner's actual checking account receipt or not, but the Philadelphia 76ers forward posted the picture of this negative balance to his Instagram account in November, and people weren't sure how to react.
Turner captioned the image "'Bank account look like im ready for early retirement...'."
Is Turner broke? Probably not, considering he's making more than $8 million this year, according to NBS Sports' Rotoworld. That being said, no one on Instagram really knew what to say to a millionaire joking about being in the red.
Snoop Dogg Makes an Awkward Endorsement
Before all the truckloads of incriminating evidence began piling up, Snoop Dogg reflexively posted an old Instagram of himself and Aaron Hernandez in response to the former New England Patriots tight end's arrest.
The message accompanying Snoop's post read: "Keep ya head up !! We prayn 4 ya."
Hernandez is innocent until proven guilty, but that doesn't detract from the awkwardness that has accumulated on this photo over the last five months.
Ken Griffey Jr. Killing the Throwback Game
To put it simply, Ken Griffey Jr. kills it on Instagram.
He relishes in goofy, old school pictures from the '90s and beyond. If you're into weird Throwback Thursday pics, Griffey Jr. is your man.
Jason Hatcher Smears 'Blood' on Face, Stares into Your Soul
The blood is fake, but the terror it induces is real.
Dallas Cowboys defensive tackle Jason Hatcher took it to heart when New York Giants defensive end Jason Pierre-Paul said to expect blood to be spilled when the two teams met this season.
After defeating the Giants, Hatcher posted this picture to Instagram with the caption: "They say blood would be shed. Just finished eating a giant. #actionspeaklouderthanwords."
Again, it's probably more terrifying than awkward, but the sheer level of anger that went into this filtered Instagram picture makes for an uncomfortable use of social media.
Vanessa Bryant: Matchmaker and Miniature Pony Enthusiast?
There's a weird thing about this picture: Matt Leinart and the woman next to him (named Stephanie) are not a couple.
The image was posted by Kobe's wife, Vanessa Bryant. As it appears, the Bryants were attending a backyard cookout and things got weird.
To be clear, we have two couples, a not-couple and a miniature horse in this image. Seems like an interesting barbecue.
Join me on Twitter for a raucous celebration of sports and miniature horses.