This Week in Annoying: The Worst in Sports Right Now
Talk about a week of disappointments.
In a matter of hours, we were given hope that the coolest sports toy ever fathomed had been invented, only to find out quickly that we were all witnessing yet another example of Internet trickery.
If that weren't enough, a childhood hero had devolved into a somber grump, giving ESPN's Linda Cohn a hard time on SportsCenter.
Unfortunately, Ken Griffey Jr. and Tony Hawk are just two people with whom we have a bone to pick this week. As always, if we left any out, please feel free to remedy that in the comments section below.
Someone Get the Kid a Smile
This week Linda Cohn had the opportunity to interview the saddest man in the world, played by the legendary Ken Griffey Jr.
The Kid looked like he had been on a two-week bender, fueled only by a multitude of press interviews and motel continental breakfasts.
The man with a sweet swing and a vibrant smile would eventually take to Instagram to apologize:
I want to apologize to Linda for the way things went today. I was in the middle of a cough attack and felt a little ill and didn't want to walk off the set. Linda has always been professional to me and my family . I'm sorry, Junior @espn @sportcenter @lindacohn
We hope Griffey gets better shortly, because his ability to communicate with other human beings is suffering.
Tony Hawk and Other Stars Remind Us We Don't Have Hoverboards
To be fair, we all knew immediately that this video was fake.
However, Tony Hawk, Terrell Owens and other celebrities still managed to produce a video that really only served to remind the world that we are still missing the one thing we actually want: a functional hoverboard.
So before this week we all knew we wanted a hoverboard but had forgotten. Thanks to a surreal production that hasn't really been explained, our wounds are reopened.
Someone get on this technology, please.
Brandon Jennings' Glorious Miss
Brandon Jennings is Brandon Jennings' biggest fan.
Please, don't interrupt him, because he needs his reflection time to bask in the wonder that is his horribly missed shot.
Manny Ramirez Is Now 'Super Manny'
Manny Ramirez has entered the delusional portion of the retirement process.
The former MLB slugger went on 'Grandes en los Deportes' on ESPN Radio 104.5 FM in Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic, via NESN.
There he offered that his career in the majors did not exactly run its course: "My qualities are still there, and I just need an opportunity to continue showing that the ‘Super Manny’ can help a team."
Hey, if this means more throws cut off from the outfield and "Manny being Manny" moments, we are all in.
Losing Teeth Looks Painful
You know what's really annoying? Losing teeth.
Really, the only people who are in danger of losing their teeth randomly remain those with a propensity to splurge on mountains of delicious taffy and NHL players.
Unfortunately for the Red Wings' Daniel Alfredsson, he happens to fall into the latter camp.