Lazy Moment Sports Hall of Fame

Matt HaupertFeatured ColumnistAugust 1, 2014

Lazy Moment Sports Hall of Fame

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    Mark Duncan/Associated Press

    In sports, we spend a lot of time celebrating players who work the hardest, demonstrate the most incredible talent and perform the best.

    While this can certainly be fun, one trait that fans really relate to the most easily gets totally left out and forgotten: laziness.

    You see, sometimes athletes are just like us. Sometimes, while all of their friends are running and sweating and working their tails off, certain guys just need to take a nap.

    And I think it's high time these fine gentlemen, and these exhilarating moments, get recognized.

    Today, we put laziness on a pedestal and celebrate those times that an astonishing lack of effort—by guys who are given millions of dollars to show effort, mind you—put a smile on all of our faces.

    Today, we celebrate the first 10 inductees into the Lazy Moment Sports Hall of Fame.

Harper Benched for Not Hustling

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    Lynne Sladky/Associated Press

    In his seven-year career, Kevin Frandsen has 15 home runs and a .257 batting average. In only two of those years has his WAR been a positive number.

    How, then, could a manager rationalize the decision to play Frandsen in the place of prodigy outfielder Bryce Harper?

    According to Washington Nationals manager Matt Williams, as reported by ESPN.com, chalk it up to Harper's "inability to run 90 feet."

    Harper was benched during a game this past April for not running out a ground ball, and Williams put Frandsen into the game in his place.

    Come on, Bryce. Mike Trout never would have done that.

Bored Yankees Fan Can't Stay Awake

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    Sometimes, laziness pays.

    One not-so-interested Yankees fan decided to use a recent game as a chance to get a much-needed nap, unable to muster up enough energy to watch other people play a sport.

    ESPN commentators had their fun with it, and the fan was not happy. Andrew Rector, 26, is now suing for $10 million for being subject to verbal abuse after being called ugly names such as "comfortable" on national television.

    Yikes. Looks like someone woke up on the wrong side of the bleacher.

Marlins Reliever Takes a Nap

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    Wilfredo Lee/Associated Press

    The fan in the previous slide couldn't quite stay awake while watching a baseball game—but hey, that's at least a little understandable, right? I mean, baseball can get pretty slow.

    Certainly, however, being a part of the team must be exciting enough to at least stay awake for the entire nine innings of a ballgame.

    Well, maybe not if you're playing the Cubs.

    During a game at Wrigley Field in 2011, then-Marlins reliever Edward Mujica was caught getting some shut eye in the bullpen.

    You know, if I had to stare at the quality of players the Cubs were trotting out for an entire afternoon, I'd probably want to close my eyes, too.

Anthony Bennett's Rookie Season

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    Mark Duncan/Associated Press

    Anthony Bennett certainly made a splash during his rookie season, proving to optimists everywhere that he was truly capable of producing the worst rookie season ever by a No. 1 pick.

    Every week he was turning heads.

    He could miss shots that nobody else could miss. He could forget to play defense at the most obviously important times. He could find ways to disappoint fans who had literally no expectations for him.

    But nothing topped this breathtakingly lazy attempt at a screen in a game against the Philadelphia 76ers.

    GIF: Anthony Bennett, casual screen setter:  on Twitpic

    Bennett plodded across the court about as quickly as a high school student walks back to class after a bathroom break, then set a screen that looked as though he might be saying something along the lines of, "Hey, man, this is a screen. Just go that way, OK? I don't have enough energy for this."

    Fans across the country are on the edges of their seats as they anxiously await what highlight-reel drama Bennett might provide in his sophomore campaign.

Andrew Bynum Suspended for Hilarious Practice Habits

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    Mark Duncan/Associated Press

    Before Andrew Bynum, there were typically two ways a player could practice:

    1. Hard

    2. Not very hard

    Last season, Bynum introduced a third practice technique that might be labeled "Go out of your way to ensure that nobody in the building is accomplishing anything. Literally, anything."

    Bynum's practice habits got him indefinitely suspended from the team, as he apparently was "shooting the ball every time he touched it in a practice scrimmage...from whatever remote part of the court he had caught the ball," as reported by Adrian Wojnarowski of Yahoo Sports.

    Always taking his game to the next level, Bynum proved the possibilities of laziness extend far beyond what the common man has accomplished to this date.

Fan Catches Foul Ball, Exerts No Energy

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    Sometimes, laziness gets you benched. Sometimes it gets you suspended.

    And sometimes, laziness is just plain cool.

    Just ask the Red Sox fan in the video above, who didn't flinch, bat an eye or even stop chewing his popcorn to catch a ball during a game against the Toronto Blue Jays at Fenway Park.

    Without hesitation, he passes the ball off to the woman sitting to the left of him and doesn't even smile.

    It's as if he's looking at her and saying, "What? You didn't expect that ball to bounce into my lap, and for me to then give it to you? Come on, I could have told you that hours ago."

    Too smooth.

Florida State Lineman Doesn't Move

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    Defenses are scary, and nobody likes to get hit!

    Still, that doesn't quite excuse and definitely doesn't fully explain the bizarre decision by Florida State offensive lineman Zebrie Sanders to remain completely frozen for the duration of a play against Florida.

    It's like one of those bad dreams where you're being chased by some awful monster but you can't move your legs.

    Sanders remains stuck in his starting position as a flurry of players run around him, playing a game of football that he has no intention of participating in.

    Perhaps he's lazy? Perhaps he's terrified? Perhaps he's nervous? Perhaps he fell asleep? Perhaps he's been placed under some kind of curse that's preventing him from moving?

    Perhaps he's on a really windy part of the field and it's just hard to move?

    Perhaps he knew that standing still would get him more media attention than trying his best ever possibly could?

    You can move on to the next slide now. I'll just keep wondering.

Bulls Defense Lets Jarrett Jack Tie His Shoes

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    Defending an NBA point guard is certainly difficult, but your job is made a whole lot easier as soon as said point guard bends down to tie his shoes while still clutching the ball against his side.

    So when the Toronto Raptors' Jarret Jack did just that toward the end of a blowout victory against the Chicago Bulls, it seemed odd that Luol Deng and the rest of the Bulls defense just stood there and watched.

    In a missed opportunity, Jack did not attempt to see how much more he could get away with in the fourth quarter of the game.

    If I were in his position, I would have tried, in no particular order, to change my socks, eat a sandwich, take a nap, snap a selfie and write a short book about the absurdity of the situation at hand.

Griffey Sleeps Through Pinch-Hitting Opportunity

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    Tony Gutierrez/Associated Press

    At 40 years old, Ken Griffey Jr. had already accomplished a great deal in his legendary career.

    Apparently, he didn't really feel like accomplishing any more.

    While playing for the Mariners in 2010, Griffey reportedly missed an opportunity to pinch hit because he had fallen asleep in the clubhouse.

    With the team in last place and Griffey's batting average stuck at .208, perhaps that clubhouse nap served a greater purpose than one pinch-hit at-bat ever could.

Ricky Davis Tries to Manufacture Triple-Double

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    When it comes to the record books, a triple-double is a triple-double, and it doesn't matter how you get it.

    Ricky Davis, then on the Cleveland Cavaliers, had that in mind when he tried to earn his the easy way during a blowout victory against the Utah Jazz. With time expiring and an enormous lead, Davis intentionally missed a shot on his own basket and then grabbed the rebound, which, had it counted, would have been his 10th of the game.

    Davis was promptly shoved to the ground by a defender—a penalty that should be induced immediately by the referees in response to any and all player displays of selfishness, laziness and stupidity.

    Then again, that might turn NBA games into two hours of a little bit of scoring and a whole lot of players getting shoved to the ground.


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