The Weakest Ice Bucket Challenges in Sports

Laura DeptaFeatured ColumnistAugust 28, 2014

The Weakest Ice Bucket Challenges in Sports

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    Brendon Thorne/Getty Images

    The ALS Ice Bucket Challenge has taken over the world—and the sports world right along with it.  

    High-profile athletes from every sport have accepted the challenge and posted videos of their own dousing.

    The general idea is to either soak yourself in ice water or make a donation to the ALS Association (many have done both). The other wrinkle is to nominate others to take the same challenge within 24 hours.

    This phenomenon has helped raise awareness for an incurable and devastating disease, and it has spurred millions in donations in the fight for a cure.

    Some sports ALS Ice Bucket Challenges have been totally boss—like the Los Angeles Kings goaltending coach using the Stanley Cup as an ice bucket or Paul George doing it (at all) with his cast wrapped in plastic.

    Others have been the opposite. Others have been weak sauce, super lame or shake-your-head disappointing. Others have taken the easy way, found loopholes or just altogether failed. 

    Some people crushed the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. These are not those people.

Wayne Rooney’s Wife

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    So uh, this is not Wayne Rooney taking the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, but rather helping to facilitate his wife’s.

    For someone who is a master of precision on the football pitch, his aim was really off on this one.

    Dropping a bucket on your wife’s head? Not smart.

Imaginary Bucket

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    At first I thought an imaginary ALS Ice Bucket Challenge as a touchdown celebration was weak, but this one had a non-weak happy ending.

    I can’t find any solid evidence that Tampa Bay Buccaneers running back Doug Martin ever took the challenge for real, but he did mimic it in the end zone and raised money in the process.

    Nina Mandell and Tom Pelissero of USA Today reported that sports agency CEO David Dunn promised to make a $10,000 donation to the cause in honor of the first player to do an ice bucket touchdown dance.

Couples Challenge

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    I don’t know why, but I just feel like a couples ALS Ice Bucket Challenge is lame, especially when it’s the uber-nauseating Justin Verlander and Kate Upton.

    This is almost as bad as flirting with each other at a baseball game.

Larry Bird's Hot Tub

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    I don’t want to knock Larry Bird because Larry Bird is the man.

    Just check out the man wearing socks in a hot tub. What? For some reason, that’s awesome.

    However, I do think it’s a little weak to do your ALS Ice Bucket Challenge while sitting in a hot tub. Just saying.

Kobe's Loophole

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    So, I believe that the water in that tub was cold, but come on. That’s not the challenge.

    Athletes take ice baths all the time. The ALS Ice Bucket Challenge is another thing entirely.

    For a man who is usually the hardest worker in any given room, Kobe Bryant sure took the easy way out on this one.

Hope Solo’s Fail

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    Stephen Brashear/Associated Press

    Hope Solo’s failed attempt at the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge wasn’t really her fault, but it was a failure all the same.

    Whoever was in charge of pouring the ice water on her head was clearly not up for the job.

    You can see the botched attempt on Solo’s Facebook page, although after it all went south, she said she would just donate instead.

Nate Robinson's Silence

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    Nate Robinson’s ALS Ice Bucket Challenge was weak because it was boring.

    He doesn’t even say a word—just walks into the room, gets doused and walks back out.

    Don’t go, Nate! I have questions! Why didn’t you speak? Do you challenge anyone else? Who are all those people in the room with you? Why are Wiz Khalifa and 2 Chainz playing in the background like some type of ice bucket soundtrack?

    Weak. Also weird.

Cris Carter's Fail

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    Maddie Meyer/Getty Images

    We’re talking about someone here who used to play professional sports.

    Maybe I’m wrong, but I always assumed a certain level of coordination was required to become a Hall of Fame wide receiver in the NFL.

    Cris Carter took the challenge, but he did not successfully complete it. Missing his own head entirely, he re-soaked Chris Berman instead.

Because It's A-Rod

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    There is nothing weak about Alex Rodriguez’s ALS Ice Bucket Challenge except the fact that he is Alex Rodriguez.

    Of all the good that has come from this craze, A-Rod emerging from the secluded woodwork of suspension is not one of them.

    He doesn’t specify who exactly nominated him. It’s unclear if anyone really did.   

Bo Pelini, Scrooge

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    Hey, man, if you don’t want to do it, don’t do it. But don’t be such a freakin’ Scrooge about it.

    Nebraska head football coach Bo Pelini could not have sounded more uninterested in the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge if he tried.

    This is ALS we’re talking about. Sorry to inconvenience you, Bo. Sorry you had to take five seconds out of your day to raise awareness for a good cause.

    Although, in his defense, that was five seconds he desperately needed to clean up his atrocious special teams unit or figure out his team's extremely troubling turnover problem.

Shower Cap Disgrace

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    Hawk Harrelson, Chicago White Sox broadcaster, put all men (and really, all people) to shame with this one.

    I mean, a shower cap? That’s so fully lame I can’t even believe it.

    The point of the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge is to dump ice cold water on yourself, to inconvenience yourself, to get out of your comfort zone.  

    Making it any more convenient or lessening the blow is taking a shortcut, and I, for one, don’t like it one bit.

50 Cent and Utter Misuse

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    You know what’s weak? Using a charitable fundraising effort to sort out your own ridiculous beef.

    You know what’s sad? Saying “ASL” instead of “ALS” when referencing the challenge.

    For 50 Cent, this is more embarrassing than that first-pitch debacle.

    Apparently 50 Cent thinks Floyd Mayweather can’t read, and he used the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge as his platform to call the boxer out.

    This whole thing is embarrassing and wrong.

Lolo Jones Doesn't Get It

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    Jason Merritt/Getty Images

    I see no bucket in this Vine.

    Lolo Jones decided to just drink a bunch of ice water and make a donation, apparently.

    In her Facebook comments, Jones wrote, “I caught some slack on twitter for how I did it. So many ppl have lost sight of what the goal is: to raise money for ALS. It's not about the ice. It's about giving.”

    Sure, the goal is to raise money, but it’s also to raise awareness.

    Famous athletes pouring buckets of ice on their heads helps bring a little lightheartedness to an otherwise very heavy topic.

    It’s awesome that Jones donated, but it's weak that she couldn’t see the forest for the trees.