The Nobel Peace Prize committee spokesperson Sven Svengali revealed today that Roger Federer was the runner-up for the Nobel Peace prize that was awarded to US President Barak Obama.
"We felt that Roger was a strong candidate in the running. Had he won the US Open and worked a little more on his backhand, not smashed his racket, avoided cursing the chair ump, he very well may have edged out Obama for the grand prize." said Svengali.
When asked what specifically about Roger Federer that had him as a prize finalist, Svengali replied, "He is a great sportsman who plays fair. He attracts attention worldwide and currently is one-upping Tiger Woods who did not make the cut for this years' peace award."
"Also the fact that he has not punched anyone out before, during or after a tennis match is an important positive. Aside from President Obama, Roger Federer has a lot of support worldwide and if he openly asks Israel and Palestine to work it out, they will.", Svengali added.
Joining Federer and Obama on the list of nominees were Bill Cosby, Bill Gates, Elton John, Queen Elizabeth, Don King, Yoda, Enya, Yeti, Yani, and Elvis Presley.
When asked why Elvis was on the 2009 Nobel Peace prize list, Svengali pointed out that although Elvis died over thirty years ago, he is still relevant to world peace.
"Nothing contributes more to world peace than being dead and of course Elvis the king is definitely doing his part," he said.
Before wrapping things up, Svengali confirmed that virtual personalities that can placate the masses into forgetting their warlike ways will be considered.
"We are distributing the videogame Mario throughout the Middle East and Aghanistan and should the results be positive, the little moustached man Mario will be a candidate to the 2010 Nobel Peace Prize."
Like the new article format? Send us feedback!