George Carlin Is Finally Safe at Home

L.J. BurgessSenior Writer IJune 23, 2008

                         Tim Parent has an even better tribute;

                                        My Pick of the Day !

                     George Carlin, a Tribute: Pucks Are for Urinals


George Denis Patrick Carlin has passed away. He was 71 years of age.

Carlin did stand-up comedy until the day he died. George had unwavering, critical opinions on most professional endeavors, including those in the world of sports. His rants on ice hockey and asides on college sports are tales of legend, but one of his (and his fan's) favorite routines was "Football vs Baseball".

It is second only to Abbott and Costello's "Who's on first ?" as baseball's best comedic ambassador to the non-sporting world.

Here is a link you can follow to his latest take on the subject.

Being an "old guy," I remember George Carlin and his early appearances on TV.  I never was one to laugh out loud much, but Carlin's timeliness and irreverence always managed to elicit an uninhibited snort out of me.

I was an amateur subversive growing up, and I always grasped for things that would irritate my white-collar father and my Baptist-raised mother. George was my kind of guy: a white, middle class, pseudo revolutionary like me.

Mr. Carlin was born in Mahattan as an Irish Catholic. A high school drop-out and an Air Force wash-out, he became a radio DJ and did stand-up comedy with partner Jack Burns in the early '60s

George Carlin became a solo act in the mid 1960s and was a "suit-and-tie" comedian, endemic to the times.

As the decade wore on, Carlin's persona and stage material made a radical shift to the left, and he transformed into the "anti-establishment, tie-dyed hippie" comic, migrating from performing on The Ed Sullivan Show to The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson as a guest host, and on to host Saturday Night Live on it's maiden broadcast in 1975.

His most infamous routine "Seven Words That You Can Never Say on Television" and his follow-up "Filthy Words" landed Carlin in a Milwaukee jail and New York radio station WBAI FM in front of the Supreme Court for broadcasting "Filthy Words" uncensored, resulting in FCC control and censorship of the airways. Censorship that is still in control today.

Yep, George really was my kinda guy.

The beauty of Carlin was that success never blunted his acerbic view, his dark brand of humor, and his constant war with the psychology, syntax, religion, propriety, and the American way of life.

I give you..."Baseball vs Football" by George Carlin.


Baseball is different from any other sport, very different.

For instance, in most sports you score points or goals; in baseball you score runs.

In most sports the ball, or object, is put in play by the offensive team; in baseball the defensive team puts the ball in play, and only the defense is allowed to touch the ball. In fact, in baseball if an offensive player touches the ball intentionally, he's out; sometimes unintentionally, he's out.

Also: in football,basketball, soccer, volleyball, and all sports played with a ball, you score with the ball and in baseball the ball prevents you from scoring.

In most sports the team is run by a coach; in baseball the team is run by a manager. And only in baseball does the manager or coach wear the same clothing the players do.

If you'd ever seen John Madden in his Oakland Raiders uniform,you'd know the reason for this custom.

Now, I've mentioned football. Baseball & Football are the two most popular spectator sports in this country. And as such, it seems they ought to be able to tell us something about ourselves and our values.

I enjoy comparing baseball and football:

Baseball is a nineteenth-century pastoral game.
Football is a twentieth-century technological struggle.

Baseball is played on a diamond, in a park.The baseball park!
Football is played on a gridiron, in a stadium, sometimes called Soldier Field or War Memorial Stadium.

Baseball begins in the spring, the season of new life.
Football begins in the fall, when everything's dying.

In football you wear a helmet.
In baseball you wear a cap.

Football is concerned with downs - what down is it?
Baseball is concerned with ups - who's up?

In football you receive a penalty.
In baseball you make an error.

In football the specialist comes in to kick.
In baseball the specialist comes in to relieve somebody.

Football has hitting, clipping, spearing, piling on, personal fouls, late hitting and unnecessary roughness.
Baseball has the sacrifice.

Football is played in any kind of weather: rain, snow, sleet, hail, fog...
In baseball, if it rains, we don't go out to play.

Baseball has the seventh inning stretch.
Football has the two minute warning.

Baseball has no time limit: we don't know when it's gonna end - might have extra innings.
Football is rigidly timed, and it will end even if we've got to go to sudden death.

In baseball, during the game, in the stands, there's kind of a picnic feeling; emotions may run high or low, but there's not too much unpleasantness.
In football, during the game in the stands, you can be sure that at least twenty-seven times you're capable of taking the life of a fellow human being.

And finally, the objectives of the two games are completely different:

In football the object is for the quarterback, also known as the field general, to be on target with his aerial assault, riddling the defense by hitting his receivers with deadly accuracy in spite of the blitz, even if he has to use shotgun. With short bullet passes and long bombs, he marches his troops into enemy territory, balancing this aerial assault with a sustained ground attack that punches holes in the forward wall of the enemy's defensive line.

In baseball the object is to go home! And to be safe! - I hope I'll be safe at home!


Thanks George, baseball will miss you...dude.


    NBA’s Worst Fans, from the Players’ POV

    Featured logo

    NBA’s Worst Fans, from the Players’ POV

    Dave Schilling
    via Bleacher Report

    The MVPs of Offseason Workouts

    Featured logo

    The MVPs of Offseason Workouts

    Brent Sobleski
    via Bleacher Report

    Dodgers Must Officially End the Puig Era

    Featured logo

    Dodgers Must Officially End the Puig Era

    Jacob Shafer
    via Bleacher Report

    Latest Rumors and Notes from OTAs 👀

    Featured logo

    Latest Rumors and Notes from OTAs 👀

    Maurice Moton
    via Bleacher Report