Jesus Christ Will Start at QB for the Seahawks in 2010

David LeonCorrespondent IApril 29, 2010

Is this the face of the man Tim Tebow would catch passes from as an H-back?  Some say the answer is yes.  

Jesus Whitehurst is pictured here performing the miracle of the five loaves and the two fish .  He was just prepping lunch for 5,000 hungry Seahawk fans on hand to watch OTAs.  Now that's the way to win a popularity contest!  Later in the day, Whitehurst would turn water into wine, proving that he is the one and only Messianic savior Seahawk fans have been clamouring for.

Note the Bing! logo patch on Jesus''s jersey.  That must be Paul Allen's doing.  Any man rich enough to put the Bing! logo on Jesus''s jersey must have a lot of Microsoft money behind him.

Speaking of turning water into wine, some fairly outlandish claims for Charlie's potential have been published in this past week.  ESPN Insider Chris Sprow published a piece showing that it is better for a QB to sit for a couple years than to start as a rookie. Ergo, throwing a kid head first into the shark tank, sink or swim, is not such a good idea. I accept that conclusion without objection. 

Keep your eyes on the Sparrow when the going get's narrow.  Then Mr. Sprow drops the two ton logical fallacy upon our heads: 

"There is also good reason to believe that, among all the QBs associated with the 2010 NFL draft (Sam Bradford and Jimmy Clausen included), Whitehurst will have the best pro career."

Don't do the crime if you can't do the time, Barretta.  So how do you answer fallacious reasoning such as this?  How about this way?  You forgot about everything else going on in politics these days.

I think we have excellent reason to believe that Mr. Whitehurst is just a temporary insurance policy for the Seattle Seahawks, not the future of the franchise.  Why do I say this?  Well, my thinking goes a little like this:

  1. Not one source has reported that Whitehurst will be the starting QB for the Seahawks in 2010.
  2. All official sources allude (briefly) to Whitehurst as the eventual successor to Matt Hasselbeck.
  3. This implies Hasselbeck is the man at this time.
  4. If the oft-injured 12 year veteran can't go this year, that succession could be immediate.
  5. You never take a flier on another team's second stringer, much less their third string QB.  Take it from Kansas City, this storyline never works out.
  6. When Pete Carroll was asked if he would draft Sam Bradford if he fell to the Seahawks, Carroll answered "Hell yes!" with great lust in his voice.  Doesn't sound like he is too married to me.
  7. There is a certain PAC-10 kid named Jake Locker gestating across the street at the University of Washington who is expected to be the next big thing.  Locker is purportedly the Ryan/Stafford/Bradford of 2011.

Keep your eye on the last point.  That's the big one.

Call me foolish, call me irresponsible, call me a rumor monger, but for some reason, I just can't seem to shake this off. I think Coach Pete Carroll is going to make a big move to get Jake Locker in 2011.  Why do I think this?  Well, my reasoning goes a little like this:

  1. Locker is the hometown hero.
  2. Locker is being carefully groomed under Pete Carroll's trusted pal and former OC Steve Sarkisian.
  3. This is just the way Pete Carroll likes his QBs prepared.
  4. Locker—in a raw state—was instrumental in Washington's massive upset of No. 3 ranked USC in 2009 (16-13).  I think Carroll remembers that one.
  5. Drafting Locker would be commercial bonanza for the Seahawks.  He'll put a lot of butts in the stands at Qwest Field.
  6. Even an expensive draft-day trade to select Locker would be a very popular move in Seattle.
  7. Paul Allen wants to personally slap the Bing! logo on Jake Locker's jersey.

Finally, the NFC West is commonly regarded as the division with no franchise quarterbacks.  We'll see what the experts say about that this time next year.  Many of us could be surprised to see this presently pathetic situation change, seemingly overnight.  

I doubt Matt Lienhart is a bust.  I think he simply had trouble convincing his coach to sit a future Hall of Famer.  

I swore Alex Smith was a bust, but I may have spoken too soon.  With improved protection, an invigorated running attack, and a spread passing attack, Alex Smith may yet blossom in 2010.  He began blossoming last season.  

The Rams just selected young Sam Bradford from Oklahoma.

Call me foolish. Call me a dreamer. Call me irresponsible. But somehow I just don't think Pete Carroll wants to be the odd man out if the NFC West is suddenly blossoming with young franchise QBs.  There is a principle of combat-symmetry that must be respected. Quarterback play is the most important single variable in contending.  It's going to be tough to win the NFC West without a franchise QB...soon.

So in summary, the Locker scenario is perfect, perfect, and perfect.  It is just too perfect. It is a perfect storm condition.  I think Jake Locker is the future of the Seattle Seahawks.


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