This is not topical. Not at all. It is not breaking news; heck, it barely was three years ago. It should have been, but things like this never are.
We don't think of NFL stars as people.
About three years ago, Laveranues Coles, a Pro-Bowl receiver, then, as now, a New York Jet, admitted that he had been raped. Not sexually abused as he tried to portray it, but raped by his step-father when he was a pre-teenage boy.
Raped.
One of the most talented and prolific wide receivers of his era, raped. Not once, as if the number of times matters, but continually.
After the Jets defeated Miami in their week two game in 2005, Coles publicly admitted that a man his mother was dating, and would later marry, started raping him.
For three years, Coles lived through the hell of being raped. For more than a decade, he lived through the hell of feeling unclean and unwanted because of it—eating away at his mind every day when he woke up.
Even as he caught more than 80 passes for 1204 yards and six touchdowns on the way to the Pro Bowl one season.
If this had happened to me, I don't think I could have gotten out of bed in the morning. I don't think I could have gone to school and put a fake smile on my face. I'm just not that strong.
Do you think you are?
Instead, we are lucky enough to be able to sugar-coat things like this when we see them and push them aside. We don't want to address the problem; we don't want to think about it.
We want to believe Coles is the exception; we want to think he's the only one who will suffer through this.
And we are right when we think he is the exception: he is one of the few who is willing to admit what happened to him.
According to data compiled by stopitnow.com, 88 percent of all cases involving “sexual abuse” of children is never reported. Ever. Eight-in-every-nine-cases. Coles is the exception.
But that's the only place where he is.
About 20 percent of girls will be sexually abused in some way as a child and between five and 10 percent of boys. Many of these cases are not as severe as Coles, but some are.
Additionally, 70 to 90 percent of these children will be victimized by someone they know.
They will be victimized by an aunt or uncle, mother or father, brother or sister, cousin, anyone. Maybe the parent of a friend. Most likely, no one will ever find out.
And that really makes sense.
Think of your most embarrassing moment. Whatever it is. Could you go up to a random stranger and tell them about it? Of course not. At the very least, I know I could not.
Somehow, Coles did. And his “embarrassing moment” is something so much more surreal than anything I could make up.
No, let me rewrite that.
His "embarrassing moment" is something so much more real than anything I could ever dream up.
"I just want to help kids because I think it happens to more people in this world than actually allow ourselves to believe,” said Coles in 2005.
“Coming up, I always felt like I was the only one that ever happened to. Then, when I started going to different sessions, they let me know that it happens to a lot more people."
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2 months ago
It hurts my feelings that you hate the Jets and love one of our icons, but I'll take the good with the bad.
It's really refreshing to see such a positive take on Laveraneus Coles for once, though. All too often I find fans, Jets fans even, criticizing Coles for being a "me" first kind of player, much too interested in his own finances.
Yet, when he's on the field, practice or game, there isn't a harder worker out there. He's a warrior on the field, a fearless route runner, and just a tough player all around. The Pro Bowl season you referenced came in a year he played with a nagging toe injury.
And because Coles takes an interest in the business aspect of the game, and looks to see that his finances are in order, too many fans look to label him as greedy and selfish, disregarding the selfless man he is off the field.
Really incredible piece, Burton. Hopefully you find a few more things to cheer the Jets for this season when you watch Coles show off his warrior spirit.
from 2 months ago
thanks for your feedback and fixes. i greatly appreciate it.
2 months ago
Excellent work! One of the best pieces I have read on BR. Print it out and hang it on your wall.
from 2 months ago
I thought it was a little too sentimental and sappy, but thanks. I'm glad you liked it.
2 months ago
jets rule
2 months ago
Great article. I was not aware of Coles' abuse as a child. as an fsu fan, coles was someone who i saw a troublemaker. but as you alluded to, it takes a strong, special person to be able to talk about such an awful event.
once again, great article
from 2 months ago
thanks, and i just drafted him in my fantasy league, so now i like him more.
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