The Saturday Speculator: Week 2

Here’s where I’m going to throw out my predictions for the Top 25 games for the week and other mostly totally erroneous opinions about the upcoming Saturday’s slate of action.

I have last week’s picks, the ones I would’ve made, tucked down there, too, so you can consider this the kickoff of The Saturday Speculator.

Just so you know, I’m picking every game the Sporting News’ crack online team deems worthwhile.

• (24) South Carolina at Vanderbilt: I would’ve taken the Gamecocks, probably by 24-6 or something. Oops.
• Eastern Illinois at Illinois: I’m on record as calling him “arguably the best quarterback in the Big Ten,” so, yeah, I’m on the Jumbo Juice bandwagon; Illini, 45-10.
• Marshall at Wisconsin: Wisconsin’s highly overrated, like every year, but Marshall isn’t even rated. Badgers win, 34-17.
• Ohio at Ohio State: I know more Ohio alums than tOSU grads. This may or may not be because no one has ever graduated from Ohio State. Still, this is the week Terrelle Pryor gets to insert himself into the hype surrounding next weekend’s trip to SoCal; Buckeyes, 52-14.
• Southern Miss at Auburn: The 2008 version of the War Eagle spread sputtered last week, and a test will come against a team that debuted its own tweaked spread under Larry Fedora. The Golden Eagles made sweet, sweet music to the tune of 633 total yards, including 426 rushing yards last week. If Auburn doesn’t come out firing, this one is close to the wire. Still, Tigers have Sen’Derrick Marks, and Southern Miss doesn’t, so 31-24.
• BYU at Washington: The Ty Willingham Farewell Tour That Suspiciously Resembles The Bataan Death March (TYFTTSRTBDM) continues, Cougars win big, 41-17.
• Cincinnati at Oklahoma: Cincinnati could grind it out and keep this close. Could. Sooners, 70-14.
• Central Michigan at Georgia: The real trouble spot for Georgia isn’t the Chippewas’ Tebow clone, Dan LeFevour. It’s Knowshon Moreno’s ACL. Bulldogs, 45-19.
• Utah State at Oregon: If I were to pick an animal that would be a lot of fun to watch in a mine, it would be a duck. (And Oregon’s a lot better than Utah State.) Ducks, 48-21.
• Mississippi at Wake Forest: This is a sexy upset pick that might come true, but I think Wake Forest’s just a little too good on defense for the very green Jevan Snead. Demon Deacons, 30-21.
• Oregon State at Penn State: This is a sexy upset pick for the lobotomized of the world who think losing to Stanford isn’t symptomatic of a program’s free fall. Nittany Lions take care of business in their first game against a real team, 28-13.
• West Virginia at East Carolina: This is a sexy upset pick for those who don’t realize West Virginia has Noel Devine and Pat White. Mountaineers, 45-20.
• Louisiana Tech at Kansas: Louisiana Tech upset the Fighting Sly Crooms last week. Mark Mangino won’t let that happen to this Kansas team, b