SAN DIEGO, CA—After a rather productive day of writing two articles, one of which proved to be highly controversial, B/R writer Eric Gomez toasted his success with a few beers at his neighborhood bar.
"First round's on me!" Gomez yelled out to his friends, not realizing he had done so loud enough for all of the bar's patrons to hear him. He would soon be on the hook for $309.34 worth of alcohol.
Later that evening, Gomez trekked back home and promptly logged on to monitor feedback to his articles. He discovered a shocking and upsetting event.
"I logged on, went straight to my profile—and I had 35 fans," he explained, looking down and shaking his head.
- B/R Ticket Guide
"This morning I had 36. I—I don't know what happened." he continued, covering his mouth in an attempt to hold back tears and squeaking noises.
After a moment he used to apparently collect himself, Gomez pulled out his cell phone and placed a call.
"Hello, 911? Yeah. I know you usually have to wait 24 hours to report a missing person, but I can't wait that long. One of my fans is missing," he said, pausing to silently await a response.
"My name? Eric Gomez. What? No, I'm not a singer. I'm a writer. What? No, I didn't write that episode of 'Everybody Loves Raymond.' I'm a sportswriter. Bleacher Report dot com.
"Oh. Well, actually, it's this open source website, so uh—technically, I'm not a professional. What? Well, yeah. See, there's this little system where people can choose to be your fans. No, it's not a little like MySpace. No, I'm not 16. What? I can't hear you over all the laughing. What?
Hello? Hello?"
Undeterred, Gomez leaped from his chair, located his jacket, and stormed out of his apartment.
"This isn't over. I'm going to find him...or her. I'm not sure who stopped being my fan. But I'll know when I see him...or her. I'll know."









comments (25) write a comment »
write a new comment
about 1 month ago
Thanks for the great story after a great thanksgiving meal and day!
from about 1 month ago
Haha, thanks. Glad I could be a part of your day.
from about 1 month ago
Good article. Although I don't celebrate thanksgiving and the first line of the article kind of bored me into writing this comment anyway...
narm
about 1 month ago
It's a weird feeling lol. 5 stars mate.
from about 1 month ago
The police were less than understanding. Thank you, that will ease the pain a bit.
about 1 month ago
I lost a fan the other day too. I was gutted — I could no longer give myself the cool moniker (in my eyes) of Alex 'Ocho Cinco' Dimond. I was going to make it a legal name and everything.
If ever you find the punk that did this, let me know....
from about 1 month ago
I'm not sure I was stoked about 36 as a number, I mean... Jerome Bettis? Meh. But the sheer audacity! I'm sure he/she has been kidnapped and/or brainwashed. I'm still looking.
about 1 month ago
It was ME! MUHAHAHAHAHA.
No it wasn't, but nice work. I bet they just deleted their profile...I don't even know how to "unfan" somebody...lol
from about 1 month ago
Hah. Neither do I as a matter a fact. That's why I'm sure something bad happened! Or something.
from about 1 month ago
You could ask Robert from the MMA community. He told me he hated me, my opinions, writing and becoming my fan was a huge mistake, and then he unfanned me. He is 15 or 16 and much more computer literate than I. I am sure if you look him up he will tell you how he did it. He is still young and loves to brag.
about 1 month ago
It's sad..especially for somebody like Eric, btw mate your articles are spectacular..to hell with the missing fan and 911 - we're counting on you, bring em home.
from about 1 month ago
I'm still out there. This message was sent via iPhone. I've been sitting outside this liquor store for hours, since that's where my fans usually hang out - but nothing yet. I'll keep you posted.
about 1 month ago
nice article! fun read!
from about 1 month ago
Thanks a lot, Andrew. Say, you wouldn't know anything about a missing fan, would you?
about 1 month ago
fun read, i think this brings to light just how important the commitment of B/R fandom is. what if you become someone's fan and they start to suck, you have to erase your profile to get out of that relationship. so when you become someone's fan, it's forever.
make those decisions wisely kids.
from about 1 month ago
Luckily, I don't suck. I mean... some of my articles haven't gotten a lot of comments, but that's just because I've directed them to smaller communities, right? Right? Oh God. Oh no.
about 1 month ago
i would be devastated if i lost a fan! i thought i lost someone so i wrote him a note on his message board asking what s wrong? did i write something that offended you? then i saw he was still a fan. i felt stupid! but i think i did lose someone but i could nt figure out who. i just remember his picture. It haunts me! those eyes!! lol. maybe i should have a contest. sign up to be my fan, we can have adrawing and the winning new fan gets an autographed picture of a tired 53 year old. lol thomas
from about 1 month ago
I was so devastated (and nerdy about it) that I wrote an article, displaying myself as a moron. When I find him/her, a firm talkin' to is in order!
about 1 month ago
I feel for you
well...not really
I only have about 9 fans
I guess no one really likes my work
but this was funny
good piece of writing Eric Gomez the singer/writer/writer again
your like a triple threat
I can see it now...
Eric "Triple Threat" Gomez
or
Eric "The Big 3" Gomez
...Eric "Three-peat" Gomez
.......
......
Eric "2 plus one, minus 5, plus 2, minus 2, plus 5" Gomez
that last one really sticks
from about 1 month ago
I might actually use that.
from about 1 month ago
I bet if you did you would have more fans
people tend to like nicknames as such
about 1 month ago
Funny stuff. I change my mind and "unfan" people every now and again but I didn't realise the distress it caused. I promise I won't do it again!
from about 1 month ago
If anything, this is a cautionary tale.
about 1 month ago
I NEVER COUNT FANS..I ASSUME THAT IF I ADD THEM THEY MAY ADD ME..IF THEY DON'T ITS THEIR LOSS..LOL..BTW-LIKED THE ARTICLE..
stokey dafire
about 1 month ago
I like to check to see my fans. I didn't know we can lose 'em *biting finger nails, looking around nervously*
Gosh, now I gotta make sure I don't tick anyone off that had fanned me.
LOL, great read Eric.
write a new comment