Humor Top Writers

Writer bio

Jim Cantrell enjoys trimming his eyebrows, exacting revenge on his enemies, and talking about himself in the third person. And cheese.

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Jon is a graduate student working on his Masters Degree in writing. He is a fan of all sports Minnesotan, but ranks mixed martial arts as his favorite sport. He was a late bloomer to MMA, not really getting into the sport until the Tito/Shamrock feud began, but doesn't really feel like he missed much leading up to all the ado.

Depending on what article you read, Jon is between 5'4"-6'8", between 120-320 pounds and may or may not be a member of the Communist party. He is single/married/divorced/widowed and enjoys drinking in the dark.

Jon is also the first winner of the Bleacher Report Humor Bowl, which he attributes either to not being held enough by his mother, or a little too much by his "uncle".

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A news junkie at heart, Tim Parent has also been known to buy a dime-bag of sports from time to time. He is a casual observer of the sports world, frequent viewer of SportsCenter and a waiting-room reader of Sports Illustrated.

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Football has always been a huge part of my life and writing here on Bleacher Report is a huge pleasure. As the community leader of the World Football section for the last 10 months or so, I've seen it grow from the English Premier League section into the global debate it is today.

I'm proud of the role I played in that transition and will continue to support our good friend Salaar as he aims to take us further.

I've recently returned to Scotland from South Africa after 10 years in the football mad continent. I've been around professional football at many levels in South Africa but now persue a career writing about the beautiful game.

I also spent plenty of time at St Georges Park, Port Elizabeth working with some of the best cricketers in the world.

I'm currently enjoying a ...

Writer bio

** Along with Alan Bass, Greg Caggiano is the co-host of the brand new hockey radio show called NHL 2Day! Please view the official site located at http://freewebs.com/nhl2day for news regarding the show as well as past episodes. He also has his own show called "Rangers Radio" which is a spinoff of the first show mentioned. Details about that show can be accessed from the same site. **

Where do I begin? I'm a seventeen year old who was born in Staten Island, New York and I currently live in New Jersey. I have a very simple life and enjoy reading, writing, watching and playing hockey, and could watch movies all day long. My sports teams come before anything (Yes, even schoolwork) and I'm both a die-hard New York Rangers and San Francsico Giants fan.

My favorite movies of...

Writer bio

Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one. – Eleanor Roosevelt, 1884-1962, American Humanitarian and Former First Lady of the United States

Life is a big classroom and we learn lessons every single moment.

My journey is not futile, it is an endeavor to accomplish very simple things, and success is not its standpoint. Writing is something I did as a vocation earlier, now I just write.

Writer bio

A Patriot fan who got on the bandwagon in 1976. I or He hates everybody, especially you. I or He feels that Raider fans can go tuck themselves. I or He don't know if this should be in third person or not.

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Ben White is more than just one man. In fact he is two people. Almost like conjoined twins but without the whole thing about heads being stuck together and no blood relation.

Ben and Chris are the two people that make up the fabled Ben White. They are both college students, Ben at Auburn University and Chris at The (so important The is capitalized) University of Tennessee. When not underachieving in their classes, Ben and Chris like to play terrible games of tennis, make weird references to forgotten movies, and write about sports.

Their incoherent ramblings can be found at www.thepigskinpathos.blogspot.com.

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I've decided I no longer want to pitch in the MLB now that Todd Jones isn't pitching. Now all I want is a stove top pirates hat and a cigarette. If I had that I might be able to be as good of manager as Leyland.

I know in my heart that if Todd Jones can make it in the MLB. There is still hope for a 6'4 lefty from the WSPSL, Wyoming Slow Pitch Softball League. (What else would it be?)

Updated 08 stats

11-1
12 Complete Games
ERA of 7.74
6 STRIKE OUTS and 1 walk 6/1 K/Walks AWESOME RATIO!!!
84 Innings Pitched

Plus, if I end up w/ a National League team, they should know, I CAN HANDLE MY WOOD!!!
Batting Average .455
On base % .612
Slugging % .743
HR 7

With these kind of numbers, what team wouldn't want this future star?

Writer bio

I'm currently a pitcher at Sierra College in Rocklin, CA. We won the state championship in 2008. Before my career at Sierra I was a quarterback at the University of Nevada, Reno. I lived the first 18 years of my life in Alameda, where I grew up a die-hard A's, Warriors, and Raiders fan. Still remember Leo Araguz punting at the Raiders practice field in my hometown. I'm most well known in the Bay Area as the big quarterback who got blasted by current Buffalo Bills RB Marshawn Lynch.

Not to sound like Ricky Henderson. Scott needs what Scott needs, but to all investors and webmaster's I NEED HELP. I love writing on bleacher report but I know I can reach a greater audience. And to the people who like my work, I'm even better talking. So, get me my own podcast or radio show on Sirius. I'm...

Writer bio

I am not important or interesting, so why waste the space.

Instead I will include a few quotes from someone I admire:

"The people I distrust most are those who want to improve our lives but have only one course of action"

"There is no escape - we pay for the violence of our ancestors"

"Beyond a critical point within a finite space, freedom diminishes as numbers increase. ...The human question is not how many can possibly survive within the system, but what kind of existence is possible for those who do survive"

"Seek freedom and become captive of your desires, seek discipline and find your liberty"

"The mystery of life isn't a problem to solve, but a reality to experience"

"All governments eventually lean furth...

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I am a lifelong Chicagoan who roots for all of the Chicago sports teams, especially the Cubs. I could die a happy man if the Cubs could just once win the damn World Series.

I have a passion for writing, but I must warn you: I am not shy when it comes to expressing my opinions. And I don't bathe frequently. But the good thing is I'm always willing to hear another side of the story, so feel free to challenge me if you do not agree with something I've written. I'm usually right, except when I am wrong.

I am married with three kids, one of each. If you want to know more about me, first consult a therapist. But if you still insist, Sam Wenk was kind enough to do a brief profile on me for BR:

http://bleacherreport.com/articles/30048-bleacher-report-exclusive-meet-cubs-senior-writer-...

Writer bio

Sometimes called the chameleon of the sea because of his remarkable ability to rapidly alter his skin color to red after just 15 minutes in the sun, Elbow enjoys coughing on buildings, pasturizing bollo ties, befuddling the element Boron, and pie.

Before devoting himself entirely to writing, Elbow worked as a secretary to the French ambassador in the Netherlands, where he fell in love with a refugee named Catherine Olympe Dunoyer. Their scandalous elopement was foiled by Marcel Marceau's quite loquacious father, and he was forced to return to Spuzzum, a town that, now, no longer exists, but once served a mean breakfast.

Writes blogs to camouflage himself from predators and is often seen near the city of Dallas running from a bee.

Thinks Hockey is good.

Writer bio

June 1968- graduated from Bradley University with a B.A. in Secondary (grades 6-12/H.S.) Education (majors Eng. & P.E.)

1969-1972- had two sons--Jim 4-16-1969 & Steven 5-4-1972. My biggest achievements in life.

1976- began teaching and also started taking classes in Registered Nursing

1980-graduated & began working as an RN in Mother/Baby Unit

1980-1989 worked in OB at 2 hospitals & cont'd substitute teaching

1989-1996-worked in Adolescent Psych as the 11-7 Charge nurse and developed the 11-7 protocols.

1993-My first grandchild was born on March 4 & he is now the oldest of my six grandchildren.

1996- Diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis (onset was actally 1965). Began working in Adult Psych

9-13-2001- resigned as 11-7 Charge RN on PSYCHIATRIC ...

Writer bio

Born and reared in Ohio, moved to South Carolina in 1990.

Attended my first race shortly after that and was hooked.

Shortly after that i figured out there was another side to racing, the inside.
Once inside, the outside just isnt the same.

I am a business owner, I like to travel, play poker, photography and motorcycles.

This year i had the honor of being the photographer of record for Darlington.
Pictures i use are pictures i have taken.
I have taken LOTS of pictures. If you need one, just ask, if i have it, it's yours.

Feedback and suggestions are encouraged and welcome. I enjoy this place, i hope you do also.

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Sports Guru in my own mind
But seriously...I'm a 25 year old firefighter/paramedic living in Garland, Texas (suburb of Dallas). I'm a life-long, diehard, for richer or poorer, sickness and in health Texas Rangers and Texas Longhorns fan. I love my other teams, very much, but Hook'em Horns and GO RANGERS!

Been a baseball player my entire life, in high school I was C/1B, scorekeeper, and assistant coach...we only had one coach most of the time. Worked baseball for the Texas Longhorns in their 2002 NCAA Championship season. And I will sit in section 41, Row 4, Seat 1 when the Texas Rangers win their first World Series...can't be much longer now.

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I'm Alex, I'm from London, and I have a job as a journalist. About insurance. If there's anything that can drive the person truly mad, it's years of writing about insurance. Trust me. I know.
But my biggest love is sports. In the UK I love my soccer teams, but I have my big American passions: baseball and football. Sure, I can deal with the odd NBA game and March Madness, as well as a bit of the NFL, but give me Ken Griffey's swing and a Penn State White Out any day of the week.
So here I am. I have a blog - http://viewfromnorthamerica.blogspot.com that I hope you'll look at at some point. And I love writing.

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College football fan first. Everything else second.

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A graduate of scenic Curry College in Milton Massachusetts, Dan Pieroni is a passionate New England sports fan. He truly lives and dies with the success of his favorite teams. Want Proof? When he was a kid he threw a table lamp across he's bedroom because the Red Sox had just lost a playoff series to the Indians.

Although he's mellowed out considerably, sports, particularly baseball, remains one of his true passions. His honest and sometimes brutal assessments of issues in sports are sure to develop a loyal fan base here on Bleacher Report.

After almost three years at Blogger, Dan has decided to leave his personal blog because he wants a wider audience and he believes that someone may be so impressed with his writing that they'd be willing to pay him for it, not that he's holdin...

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I am a well-known marketing consultant and the author of KILLER BRANDS. I went to my first UGA football game in 1944 when I was six months old. It is in my blood.

In 1961, I coached a 6th and 7th grade football team to a 16-0, not just undefeated, but unscored-upon season. In one game, we scored on every play from scrimmage winning 63-0 in six minute quarters.

I continue to be a student of the game.

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New Jersey raised expat living in the Rhineland region of Germany. Rabid Jets and Mets fan.

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Dave is the epitome of a Mets Lifer. A fan since 1985, he bleeds orange and blue and has suffered through the ups and downs of being a Mets fan for the past 23 years.

He created MetsLifer.com in 2007 as a way for he and fellow Mets Lifer, Bryan, to move their daily Mets email conversations out into the public domain.

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Hey all, I work for YOUbeQB.com, a fantasy football site that offers a new spin on fantasy football. I post alot of the content that is found on my site to this site because not only is it relevant, but you can expect to get a good laugh out of the article. So look out for more content and check out www.YOUbeQB.com.

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"I'm going to Disneyland!"

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I am a senior in High School who loves sports and wants to pursue a career in Broadcasting in college.

I am a Chicago Bears Community Leader.

My favorite teams are the Chicago Bears, Chicago Bulls, Chicago Blackhawks, and Florida Everblades of the ECHL. I am a die hard fan of the Chicago Bears.

I write about the NFL, the NBA, the NHL, MLB, my favorite teams and other relevant topics or anything that sounds interesting.

I have met many NBA players in my lifetime. I have met Chris Mullin, Mitch Richmond, Coach K, Rod Higgins, B.J. Armstrong and Byron Russell ( the player on the Utah Jazz who MJ scored against in the NBA finals). I have met two NHL players. I have met Chad Larose of the Carolina Hurricanes and Shane Hnidy of the Boston Bruins. I have met Brandon Phillips and...

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First and foremost: I like cars. I like racing them, I like watching them race and I like the intricacies of them. Ever since I was a child, I loved watching cars race regardless of what series they were. In the end though, Formula 1 became my forte! When it comes to this series, I don't have any favourite team in particular. My favourite driver, on the other hand, is Kimi Raikkonen and I was really glad to see him take the WDC for 2007.

As well, I follow the Le Mans and the American Le Mans Series. It's very different from Formula One in that you have to think more towards the future rather than the present in order to win a race. At least that's how I see it.

Overall, when it comes to motorsport, I turn on my inner child and go nuts!

I also follow the Red Bull Air Race, a new...

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I could sit back and tell you my life story but I'm really just another sports fan. You can find out more by visiting http://www.miamimitch.com

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I'm a Freshman at The Ohio State University majoring in History/Pre-Education, but who knows how long that will last.

Sports have always been my life. Football is by far my favorite. The Ohio State Buckeyes obviously have my heart, and my NFL team would have to be the Giants. I'm pretty excited for this college football season, mainly because I am a Block O Season Ticket Holder. It's ok you can be jealous. =]

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Mathematics major at the University of Florida.
Future law school student, not yet sure where.
Lifelong Gator fan, born and raised among the savages in Tallahassee.

College Football is my jam.

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Displaced fan living in Chicago following the Cuban and the Cubs hype.

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Alex is a recent history graduate, who is starting a postgraduate journalism course in September. With an unflinching belief that he is always right, a convenient disregard for facts that might not support his view and an ability to write thousands of words on the most trivial of stories, Alex naturally believes he has all the skills required to become a great journalist. With past experience including a blog that reached literally tens of people worldwide and an article his mum read, he also believes he has the popularity to succeed.

Alex knows a lot about sport - last year alone he predicted Tiger Woods would win a major, and an English team would win the Champions League - so his is an opinion worth listening to. He also bet on the Giants to win the Superbowl, before the Playoffs ...

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Psycho about the New England Patriots.

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I was born in Carnegie, PA. As such, I'm a die hard Penguins and Steelers fan. Occasionally, I follow the Pirates too. Can you really blame me?

I live near Charleston, SC so following has gotten a little harder, but I do my best.

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I want to start off by apologizing to the fellas who have landed on this page based off of my profile picture. Sorry, I am the GUY in the photo. Sorry to disappoint. But now that you're here...

In no way, shape, or form do I think I'm important, however I do love to talk, and write. For whatever odd reason people find what I have to say to be mildly entertaining or maybe even sometimes making sense. I am a good conversation starter, so if what I'm saying sparks debate or gets people going...then I've done my job.

I went to Ohio State University (oops, sorry THE Ohio State University, thanks President Gee). Like anyone, I love the college I attended, but as a Columbus resident I was a die-hard OSU fan before my college years. Fortunately for you, the reader, I am not disgustingly ...

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I was born in Highbury, London, longer ago than anyone can remember. The sports that really interest me as a spectator are F1 and international football, although I cannot find club football personally involving enough nowadays. I also like to watch the big cycle tours, although after many years I am still struggling to understand the tactics. The only sport I have participated in as an adult is clay shooting.

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Hi my name is Yoosof. I'm 16 years old and I live in Gillingham in Kent (UK). I'm an avid sports fan, I play and watch a lot of sport - my favourite sports are football (soccer), cricket, tennis, golf and formula 1, although football is what I mainly write about. I'm writing on bleacher report because I want to get experience writing sport articles because I want to be a sports journalist in the future.

Also, check out my blog site where I write about my local team Gillingham FC - http://gillingham.blogsfc.com

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where should i start , i guess at the beginning . i was born in the wagon of a traveling show , my momma used to dance for the money they'd throw . not really , this is Cher's bio . i borrowed it because my life could use a little help ,so here's the real story( with a little puffery , thats common in these things makes our lives seem a little less useless) . i'm an american by birth new orleanian by the grace of god.. i am unmarried, unemployed, and live in my mother's basement, with my little dog Flike. i don't get out much, so football fills the void that should be my life . i like movies (italian post war neo-realism mostly) too. my dislikes are , the dallas cowboys and, capital letters.so any ladies out there interested ?... please ladies only, although my mother sez at th...

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Former athlete, Vietnam soldier, signwriter, forester, surveyor,draftsman, truck driver, living on a poodle ranch in the hills of southwest Oregon. Love to write, play guitar, shoot guns, read maps and follow my Trailblazers, Ducks and Cubs.

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Mary Jo Buchanan is a long-time race fan. She first became interested in racing at the dirt track in Selinsgrove, PA, following her uncle's accomplished dirt track driver Jan Opperman. Sponsored by her grandfather's hardware store, Bogar's Building Supply, the #99 car won many races on the Pennsylvania dirt track circuit. Based on her experience in the pits, Mary Jo has become an avid racing fan, watching all series of NASCAR racing. Several years ago, she was chosen as one of five nationally recognized NASCAR fans to share her opinions with NASCAR at their national marketing convention. She follows racing for the thrill and excitement, as well as the wonderful people and friends she has made in the racing community.

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I am 20 years old (21 in two weeks! Yay!) and am a junior at West Virginia University. I'm studying journalism with a focus on news-editorial at WVU and actually work at the campus newspaper as an editor. I'm primarily a hard news and crime reporter, but I have a newly found passion for English soccer/football and have always been a fan of Philadelphia sports.

I'm already a season ticket holder for Philly's MLS team.

I'll follow Newcastle United and the Philadelphia Phillies to the end and to a lesser extent, the Mountaineers.

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When you live as close as I do to Boston, you have to be a Red Sox fan. And so I was. I never really followed the games (we didn't have cable TV till I was 17 years old) but I knew all the basics: It's always "next year." The Yankees suck. We hate the Yankees. Scream loud and long, and always support your team.
I remember watching Game Four of the '04 World Series on a big screen TV at a local movie theater. That changed my entire outlook on the Sox, and I began to follow them. It wasn't until I went to Fenway Park in August of '07 that the obsession started. Then it just exploded, and no one could stop it.
Ever since then, I've been doing some blogging about the Sox, and my love of writing has finally mingled into a full-fledged mania with writing articles about th...

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Aside from being a sports fan like the rest of your here on b/r, I'm a person committed to getting the right things to the right people in the right place at the right time, and that's why I'm majoring in Information Systems. I am a proud alumnus of Cal State Long Beach, after already earning a couple AA degrees at Long Beach City College.

I maintain a couple of blogs on Blogger. I am striving to be highly proficient in a number of computer application programs I use.

I follow a number of pro/semi-pro clubs: Los Angeles Galaxy, Long Beach State (all teams), Los Angeles Angels, Long Beach Armada, Los Angeles Avengers, Los Angeles Lakers, LA Sparks, LA Riptide, Chelsea FC, Melbourne Victory, Saskatchewan Roughriders, Belmont Shore RFC, and FC Tokyo.

And I love anime and manga. ...

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From Tennessee, I have lived in Louisiana so long I have become a split fan. Volunteers and Tigers capture my thoughts in September, and when the two actually meet I cannot bear to watch. My loyalty usually leans toward the one with the best shot at a championship, so the 2007 game in Atlanta was incredibly stressful.
Between weekends I design circuits and program industrial controllers, but in the real world of the weekend I live to see Florida, Georgia and Auburn feed on each other, opening the way for another unbearable championship between LSU and Tennessee. And of course, Sunday is all about the Saints.

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I grew up in Memphis as a huge sports fan, began writing sports columns at the age of 13 for my junior high newspaper. From there it was two years with The Teen Appeal and then three years with the North Shelby Times. Since June of 2007, I've been co-owner and senior columnist for "The Nasty Boys' Sports Blog", where I write up to five columns a week. I'm a student at Crichton College and also will be releasing a book at the beginning of 2008 about the glorious summer of 2006, "Mr. Goodbars and Fly Balls". I'll keep you posted about the release and make sure you all get a copy!!!!!!

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I'm back. I missed you guys too much.

I get paid real money to write about high school football and basketball at a national level. You may not realize that from my posts, but it is true. And the checks I get don't bounce. Bonus.

If you want to argue sports with me, you know where to find me. But before you check in, just know I'm right. It makes the arguing part go a lot easier for yourself.