NFL Combine 2017 Notebook: New Coaches Face the Music, QBs Measure Up

New head coaches arrive at the NFL combine like newlyweds fresh off their honeymoon. They've been nestled inside team headquarters since the day they were hired, basking in the afterglow of being named the Chosen One who will lead the franchise to the Promised Land. 

Then they step to the podium in Indianapolis, reporters fire off questions, and everything suddenly gets real.

• Who's your quarterback?

• How will you solve all of your team's problems?

• Is there already friction with the meddling owner? The demanding team president? The executive who not-so-secretly would rather be coaching whose initials are T.C.?

• What the heck were you thinking in the fourth quarter of the Super Bowl?

This year's combine coverage kicks off with first impressions of the first-year coaches who made their national debuts this week. We'll look at how they handle the tough questions, how well they talk about the "process" (a must for any successful coach) and even how they dress, because no detail is too small.

It's all part of the process (see?) of deciding whether someone can handle one of the toughest professions in the world based on a 15-minute interview.

Which is precisely what the NFL combine is all about.

Sean McVay, Los Angeles Rams

David J. Phillip/Associated Press

The Wardrobe

Plaid long-sleeved dress shirt, size "smedium," sleeve cuffs unbuttoned, with a mousse'd up tussle of reddish-brown hair that made the 31-year old Rams coach look like a cross between a CW heartthrob and Thomas Dimitroff's nephew.

Grade: A

Use of the Word "Process"

McVay can sling football cliches like a coach twice his age: a 34-year old, presumably. But he also peppered is press conference with rat-a-tat-tat explanations of his offensive philosophy. Specifics at a combine press conference? He'll soon learn that's a no-no.

Grade: B+

Comfort with Quarterback Situation

McVay sounds guardedly optimistic about Jared Goff. "Once we get Jared in the building, it's gonna be about teaching him our system," McVay said. "Seeing how he processes things, how he's able to handle the above-the-neck information, and be able to translate it to the grass once we get out on the field in the OTAs. ...

"You see the traits. You see the characteristics. ... I'm very excited about Jared and some of the things we've seen on tape from him."

Grade: B

Overall First Impression

McVay looks card-him-at-the-bar young. Wade Phillips, his defensive coordinator, probably owns snow tires older than him.

That said, McVay comes across as bright and confident, and he has surrounded himself with a veteran staff, led by Phillips. He sounds realistic about his goal of rebuilding the Rams offense through "daily improvement."

Perhaps a wunderkind is just what the Rams need after spending years stuck in neutral under the guidance of the old guard.

Grade: A-

Vance Joseph, Broncos

Michael Conroy/Associated Press

The Wardrobe

Snazzy brown blazer over black V-necked T-shirt. That's how reporters dress, Coach!

Grade: A+

Use of the Word “Process”

Joseph already possesses a veteran coach’s ability to work the word “process” into one sentence three or four times.

Grade: B+

Comfort with Quarterback Situation

Joseph sounds comfortable with the idea of letting Trevor Siemian and Paxton Lynch compete through training camp.

There were no Tony Romo questions, because none of us wanted John Elway to take the podium later and whiz a football at our faces.

Grade: B

Overall First Impression

Joseph hit the new coaching jackpot by landing in Denver, and he sounds like he knows it.

“The team won nine games. The perception was the offense wasn’t very good. But in my opinion the offense was pretty good. They didn’t finish well in the red zone, but the quarterbacks played well. And again, winning nine games is a nice feat in the league, and they should have won two more games.

“Offensively, I think we’re close, not as far as everyone thinks we are. Offensive line: We need some help there. But we’re close offensively.”

Joseph sounded like the right man for the job in Denver. “The job in Denver” largely involves fitting in to John Elway’s vision rather than supplying Joseph's own. But that shouldn’t be hard to do with the infrastructure Joseph is inheriting.

Grade: B+

Kyle Shanahan, San Francisco 49ers

Michael Conroy/Associated Press

The Wardrobe

Black fleece pullover with a zippered collar over a gray T-shirt. This is what 90 percent of NFL coaches and scouts wear all the time, including at weddings, poolside and while undergoing surgery.

Grade: B+

Use of Word "Process"

Shanahan communicates like a normal human. It may be his way of rebelling against his father.

Grade: B

Comfort with Quarterback Situation

With Colin Kaepernick planning to opt out of his contract, per Ian Rapoport of NFL Network, Shanahan said he has lumped last year’s 49ers quarterbacks in the same category as the rest of the NFL free agents. Under the circumstances, moving on seems like a prudent policy.

Grade: A

Overall First Impression

Shanahan explained the biggest difference between being a coordinator and a head coach in the relatively quiet first weeks of the offseason.

"This time of year, in the past, I've gotten to the office in my sweats, I've shut the door, I've turned on some tape, came out for lunch, and then to leave to go home.

"Head coach is different. A lot of other things come up, especially when we're all new. I'm sure it will get smoother in the offseason. But just trying to put together an entire coaching staff, learn how the building works, being able to be downstairs with the coaches and making sure I go upstairs with all the personnel guys who have been working on that year round—it takes time to get on the same page.

"You can't just do that by talking all the time. You have to watch tape together. You have to go over and over it with a bunch of different people. In the past for me, it has just been the offensive staff, which was a little bit easier. Now it's a little bit of everybody."

It sounds like NFL Coaching 101. Shanahan still plans to be his own coordinator and call his own plays. If he's starting to feel a little time crunch now, wait until he's trying to do the job of two-and-a-half coaches in September.

But in San Francisco, any evidence that decision-makers are leaving their offices to have productive conversations with each other is an encouraging sign.

Grade: B+

Anthony Lynn, Los Angeles Chargers

Gregory Payan/Associated Press

The Wardrobe

The color of Lynn's long-sleeved sweater could be described as "Chargers Blue," but it's not certain if the Chargers even know what color they wear these days.

Grade: C+

Use of the Word "Process"

Lynn doesn't lean on any one cliche, but he knows the ropes. When asked whether the Chargers will be a smashmouth team like the Bills or pass-oriented the way they have been in the past, Lynn didn't miss a beat. "I want to be balanced." That's how a seasoned coach answers a question at the combine.

Grade: B+

Comfort with Quarterback Situation

Thanks to Philip Rivers, Lynn is the only new coach with no reason to be uncomfortable at quarterback.

Lynn is also unconcerned about the franchise moving from San Diego, saying that the organization is taking the necessary steps for a smooth transition to Los Angeles. That's funny: Last year, Jeff Fisher sure did make it sound like only a seasoned coach like him and an army of Sherpas could successfully guide an NFL team to a new city.

Grade: A

Overall First Impression

The Chargers barely have a media presence right now; San Diego has unfriended them and Los Angeles hasn't discovered that they exist yet. That made Lynn's press conference strange. There were almost as many questions about the Bills as the Chargers.

I spent a few quiet minutes with Lynn after his conference, and he came across as a flexible coach who plans to let assistants like offensive coordinator Ken Whisenhunt do their jobs while he sets the tone of the team on both sides of the ball.

Lynn is going to take his time making decisions. If a coach wants to fly under the radar while he plans the direction of his organization, the Los Angeles Chargers are the team to do it for.

Grade: B

Sean McDermott, Buffalo Bills

Michael Conroy/Associated Press

The Wardrobe

Dark blue long-sleeved dress shirt with a Bills logo where the alligator should be.

Grade: B

Use of the Word “Process”

McDermott uses “process” the way Brainy Smurf uses “smurf.” He sounded like a man who tells his kids that he loves the process when he hugs them before bedtime or "processes them for sleep."

Grade: A+

Comfort with Quarterback Situation

McDermott sounded like he would rather defuse a nuclear warhead than answer a simple question about Tyrod Taylor.

Grade: D

Overall First Impression

Here’s McDermott’s response to the question: “Do you want Tyrod Taylor back?”

"We're going through that process right now. And the thing about all of our players—and Tyrod's no different—is we're going to go through the process. We're going to exhaust every ounce of time, look at it from every angle. I think the thing you'll find out about me is I'm pretty methodical in my approach. And so it takes time, and that's what's in front of us right now."

Having followed McDermott’s career since his Eagles days, I know he’s a bright, creative and well-respected coach, not the malfunctioning process-bot suggested by the quote above.

McDermott inherited an unnecessarily complicated quarterback decision. He will be hard to evaluate until we can start separating the Bills mistakes of regimes past from the decisions McDermott is empowered to make in the present.

Grade: C

Doug Marrone, Jacksonville Jaguars

Michael Conroy/Associated Press

The Wardrobe

Marrone’s sleeveless Jaguars vest and short-sleeved golf shirt combo was nondescript.

His hands were another story. Marrone likes to stand with his fingers outstretched on the podium, looking like he is about to palm a wrecking ball. The man may or may not have head coaching chops, but he definitely has some meat hooks.

Grade: B+

Use of the Word “Process”

Not elite. Marrone can go whole sentences without it.

Grade: B

Comfort with Quarterback Situation

“I see Blake [Bortles] as our quarterback, and we’re going to do everything we can to make him successful,” Marrone said.

That’s a pretty clear endorsement. Misguided and potentially disastrous, but clear.

Grade: C

Overall First Impression

It's hard not to look at Marrone and see the guy in command of the Starship Enterprise for the first five minutes of an old Star Trek movie, before Admiral Kirk shows up and finds some excuse to take command of the ship. Tom Coughlin is the guy with the vision for improving the Jaguars until proved otherwise.

Marrone said all the right things, but he said them in such a vague way that he sounded like a coaching retread with little to offer. A coach doesn't have to be exciting in press conferences to be good, of course. But a little bit of tone-setting intensity, or at least specificity, doesn't hurt.

Grade: C

Quarterback Prospects Pass Their First Test

Jasen Vinlove-USA TODAY Sports

There won't be any quarterback height or hand-size dramas this year.

The consensus Big Four quarterback prospects—Notre Dame's DeShone Kizer, Texas Tech's Pat Mahomes II, North Carolina's Mitch Trubisky and Clemson's Deshaun Watson—also measured in at 6'2" or taller, with throwing hand spans longer than nine inches.

That means everyone is tall enough to ride the NFL's big-boy roller coasters, with hands big enough to grip the big-boy football, even on a cold December day.

What on earth will we talk about for the next two months?

Some may think the obsession with height and (especially) hand size is a load of draftnik hooey. But scouts and coaches take it all very seriously.

Browns head coach Hue Jackson reacted positively Thursday to the news that the top quarterbacks cleared the 74-inch barrier. “I think a guy has to be about 6'2" to play in this league," he said.

Jackson then pointed out former Steelers quarterback Kordell Stewart, now a media member, standing among the crowd. Stewart, for all his virtues, fell below the 6'2" threshold.

"The special guys ... there have been guys who have played in this league who are not 6'2". But the majority of the guys who have played are 6'2" or a little bit better, and that’s just what I like in a quarterback.”

The consensus among Draftnik Nation is that there are no athletically "special guys" in this year's quarterback class. Which is why cracking the 6'2" and nine-inch plateaus were so important for the Big Four. Teams may reach for some of them, but they won't have to make an exception for any of them.

Quarterback Weigh-In Results for the Big Four

• DeShone Kizer: 6'4", 233 pounds
• Pat Mahomes: 6'2", 225 pounds
• Mitch Trubisky: 6'2", 222 pounds
• Deshaun Watson: 6'2", 221 pounds

Lifting Live

Mike Tanier

Fans can attend this year's NFL combine, which means that offensive linemen (and others) performed their bench-press drill before not just scouts, coaches and television cameras, but a crowd of perhaps 200 serious football junkies of all shapes and sizes.

I know what you must be thinking: Only a crazy person would pay to watch other people lift weights. But it turns out that watching bench-pressing drills is strangely compelling theater.

The lifters, particularly the linemen, rip off those first reps like they could hoist 225 pounds over and over through an entire Hobbit trilogy. Then they start to tire. Their arms buckle. The weight bar lists, usually to the left. The crowd (and other prospects) shout encouragement. The coach supervising the drill implores the prospect to "lock out!" snapping his elbows to full extension for that one last rep.

Eventually, even the mightiest left tackle can lift no longer. But usually not before completing 20 to 30 reps and earning a warm round of applause. It's sweaty, visceral and dramatic.

Best of all, linemen went directly from bench presses to media interviews, which means they showed up tired, adrenalized and, in some cases, looking like they were ready to eat us.

Utah guard Isaac Asiata (pictured above) put up an impressive 35 reps of 225 pounds on Thursday, and he still wasn't satisfied. "I wish I could have gotten more," he said. "But it is what it is."

Asiata, the cousin of Vikings fullback Matt Asiata, was hoping to put up 40 reps, a number he said he often reaches during workouts. "I don't make any excuses for myself," he said. "But I wish I got 40."

Asiata enjoyed performing for the crowd. "That was fun. It gets you juiced."

The combine has slowly evolved over the years from an NFL insiders event to a media circus to a yet another opportunity to sell tickets to ancillary football-flavored events.

It's hard to gauge where the evolution will end. Forty-yard dashes against fans on bicycles? Private interview questions asked by season ticket holders? Bench-pressing in front of an audience would have sounded ridiculous 10 years ago.

No matter what the NFL does, the fans keep coming. Maybe it's because some of these wacky events turn out to be secretly fun. On a chilly Thursday afternoon at the end of winter, we all need an excuse to get a little juiced.

Chuck Pagano Achieves Peak Combine

Gregory Payan/Associated Press

The coach and general manager press conferences at the combine are stultifying and mind-alteringly boring. As the First Impression slides suggest, every pearl of coaching wisdom or genuine insight is buried among 15 minutes of cliches, deflections, vague generalities and repetition of the word "process" until it becomes like a mantra that lulls listeners into a state of lower consciousness.

Chuck Pagano took human communication to a whole new level Thursday when he delivered this response to a simple question about whether the Colts plan to be more youth-oriented than they were in past seasons.

"It’s a process. We know it’s a process. We know how we’re judged, by wins and losses. Eight and eight in the past two years is not good enough. The standard is the standard.

"The expectations are what they are. We’re never going to be satisfied until we get back to where we need to be. We have a lot of work to do.

"We’ll continue to evaluate our roster. Obviously, we’re here to evaluate these players, build the roster. If we get younger, we get younger. If we get faster, we get faster.

"Try to create competition within the roster. We’ve got a lot of work to do. But the objective always is to win."

Was that refrigerator poetry? A latter-day Tao? An alien's desperate attempt at human communication? There's an almost lyrical quality to Pagano's axiomatic gibberish, a sense that if he offered up just one more empty tautology (If I breathe, I breathe. My sandwich is tuna), we might finally comprehend the universe's greatest mysteries, including how Pagano is still an NFL head coach.

Oh, and Pagano spoke for nearly 20 minutes, most of which were as informative as the quote above.

Keep in mind that NFL coaches pride themselves on being great communicators.

The moral of the story: When Bill Belichick answers a question he doesn't like with a grimace and a grunt, he's actually doing us all a favor.