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So, LaDainian, thanks for meeting me. I know my message sounded kind of ominous, but I’m glad we can finally talk.I think we both know what this is about. Who are we kidding? We’ve had a great run together...

Fantasy Football: My Break-Up with LaDainian Tomlinson

by R.K. McCoy (Scribe)

13

533 reads

Sports

October 14, 2008

NFL, LaDainian Tomlinson, Fantasy Football, Fantasy

So, LaDainian, thanks for meeting me. I know my message sounded kind of ominous, but I’m glad we can finally talk.

I think we both know what this is about. Who are we kidding? We’ve had a great run together. I remember winning the draft lottery and taking you No. 1 overall in my keeper fantasy league four glorious years ago. We have so many great memories together don’t we?

Remember back in ’06 when you had your four-TD games against St. Louis, Denver, and San Francisco? What a magical year! I practically waltzed to my league title. You’ve been the key cog in all my keeper-league lineups over the years, and I appreciate all your dedication.

Let’s cut through the niceties though. I wanted you to hear this from me: I’m putting you on my trading block. It wouldn’t be right if you heard it from Matt Forte or Adrian Peterson’s owners. I owe that much to you.

We’re two different people now. Neither of us should be blamed for it. I’m looking for a younger, healthier, more consistent running back, and you’re on your last leg as a thoroughbred. I don't want that to hurt you, but it's just reality for me.

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You’re old for an NFL running back, LaDainian, and you’re doing what old running backs do. You shuffle through the line instead of exploding through. You’re carrying nagging injuries throughout the entire season, and you’re surly with reporters, like Andrea Kremer, when they question your durability.

Maybe it’s just your toe this week, but next week it will be your arthritic fingers or your dentures will be too tight. I know why you don’t take your helmet off. It’s the liver spots isn’t it?

My point is that this is the natural order of things. You usurped the majestic Priest Holmes for fantasy supremacy, and now it is time for you to pass the torch to the next juggernaut.

C’mon man, don’t cry. This is hard for me, too. You had to see this coming when Norv Turner showed up and began his systematic destruction of the Chargers. Or even when your marble-like lead blocker Lorenzo Neal was let go; don’t act like you didn’t see the writing on the wall.

We can still be friends, can't we? When you have a late season run of a couple of 100+ yard games and multiple TDs, you can count on there being a soft spot in my heart for you (unless I’m playing your owner in which case I’m pulling for six fumbles and a stomach virus) as  I root for my first fantasy love.

This is best for both of us. We can avoid the awkwardness of me continually insulting you to everyone I know about your inability to carry my football team any more and you can settle in to a string of 1,000–1,200-yard seasons with six–10 TDs without my gigantic expectations weighing on you.

Like I said, it’s been a great run. You’ll always be the first running back I ever loved. I wish you nothing but the best (again, unless you are playing me). Let’s hug it out. I can't stay long though. I have a date with Darren Sproles later tonight.

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comments (13) write a comment »

  1. HA! I like the format, but is it really time to close the door on him? He's got a pretty sweet schedule coming up. Besides, he's always slow out of the gate after not playing at all in the preseason. Funny article though.

  2. I personally thought it was hilarious. FANTASTiC article. Hahaha

  3. Thanks for the thoughts!

    Jimmy-
    You're right. He does have a nicer schedule coming up, but something just seems to be off about him this year. There's no burst and the Chargers seem ok with relying on Rivers' arm.

    Travis-
    Thanks for the kind words. It was a tough break-up, but I'm very happy with Matt Forte and Brandon Marshall now. We're moving on.

  4. This could be a painful breakup if he explodes with the schedule coming up, but i agree...

  5. Reports are that his toe is getting better and better. Barring the worst (which can happen to any RB any given Sunday) he should be a #1 back the rest of the season, particularly after the bye.

  6. Only two running backs in the history of NFL have won the rushing title at 30 or older. Curtis Martin who was 31 and gained 1 more yard than Shaun Alexander in 2004. And some guy in the 50s who was 30.

    This is LT's last year as a player in his "twenties"

    The run is over, onto the next workhorse.

  7. I'm frustrated with LT too since he's hurting my fantasy team but I still think he's a great buy-low candidate in fantasy leagues and on the new website OneSeason, where you can trade virtual shares in sports players, teams and leagues for real market based returns. Sure, he's hurting but LT just said that his toe feels the best it has since Week 1 and we all know that LT is old but I'm not ready to say he's washed up a la Shaun Alexander just yet. Get LT on OneSeason now before it's too late and his share price reflects his comeback.

  8. Totally agree with the article. I'm not an LT owner this year, but I do have Darren Sproles on a couple of teams. Sproles might be the better option than an injured LT, but that would a very public insult to LT.

    http://talkingff.blogspot.com

  9. Remember Rocky III, where Rocky going all "corporate" led him astray from his hunger for competition and he was demolished by Clubber Lang in their first encounter? LT's corporate presence as the Vizio Spokesman, Nike and Campbell's Soup endorser are conveniently simultaneous with his decline in production. He is aging, but part of me feels he's started to buy into his own hype and lost the intensity that fueled the 20+ touchdown seasons.

    I enjoyed your article a lot, keep it up!

  10. this should be under Humor cuz it was hilarious.

    I hope he turns it around because I have him one of my leagues

  11. A ton of great comments. Thanks for the feedback!

    As I mentioned in the article, I think he's on the downward slope, but I do agree with Rael. He's an outstanding Buy Low candidate, because if he does resurge his schedule is very accommodating.

    But like Kenny points out, the historical numbers don't lie. LDT is older and seems to be slowing down.

    Jeffrey-
    I love your points. Doesn't it make you look at his decision to sit out against the Pats last year in a different light?

  12. Are you gonna break up with your girlfriend when she gets old too?

    Nice article.

  13. HA! If she starts tanking my fantasy team then we will definitely discuss our options. Thanks!

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